Boring Travel Post, Woo!

I have a riddle for you: what has two thumbs and was recently chilling more than a thousand kilometres from his house.

This guy

Having never in my life travelled further away than the coast before, it proved to be a strange, exciting and utterly exhausting week -- impressions hardly helped by the necessity of dragging an infant from one end of Melbourne to the other. And though my experiences are anything but unique, I am at heart a blogger, and that means I'm still going to tell you all about it whether you like it or not. I mean, what are you going to do: stop reading?
...
Actually, please don't do that.
...Hello?
Guys...?

Well, nuts to you jerks, I'm going ahead anyway.

No Boys Allowed

By this point, it's probably pretty clear that I'm a father. And with parenthood comes a whole host of new and exciting experiences, most of which revolve around the excretion and subsequent removal of several fairly disgusting bodily fluids. Despite living in a civilised society, babies frequently refuse to hold off on such excretion until they can find a toilet, and will gladly urinate all over the floor if you let them. This is because babies are disgusting, and you should be ashamed of having ever been one.

Truly, truly disgusting.

The Thing On Our Doorstep

(Guys, I had some uploading issues with this post. It was meant to go up last week, but wouldn’t: presumably I displeased the Internet God and this was His pale, sweaty judgement. Anyway, here’s this one, and hopefully from here on out it’ll be every second Thursday at 8pm Queensland time.)

Before I start, can I just say: wow. It's been six days since I published my first post, and in that time its pageviews rocketed up from one lost little view, up to seventy-five. Seventy-five people, reading what I’d written. And not just from Australia: our ever-helpful Overlord, Google, tells me a significant number of views came from America, and a small handful even originated in Europe.

This mightn't sound like a huge deal, seeing as there are websites out there that rack up millions of hits per day from all over the world, but to a tiny wannabe like me just starting out: wow. And it feels truly amazing to someone who’s greatest dream in life is to be read. So to everyone who took a chance clicking on my last post: thank you, and I hope you enjoyed it. I'd like to thank you more concretely, but until I can find a way to science high-fives through the internet, words will have to do.

We're thinking maybe voodoo?